Zombie ... Redux

   I'll try this chapter over again..

 
 On waking from a Zombie Nightmare-----

   A lid to a frying pan fell off a chair, a desk, a dresser… the clang reverberated through my ears/my mind as it hit the floor. It was about 2AM. I had been asleep up until just a minute before. The dull Clang matched my brainwaves ..somehow this Clong!, I guess the lid had landed on some piece of clothing or newspapering... as I lay pondering the dream, life, why did it seem so real…? the dream.. ? and then, as I lay in bed. Clong! I swear I hadn't moved or disturbed it.

  Awakened and chilled to the bones from a nightmare.. where I was the last man on Earth fighting like Hell, cajoling, begging, arguing, dream state, at  a beach after the waves had repeatedly swept through my cabin/tent and I was on the shore and people kept arriving at the beach and don't eat it… 'Don't eat that shit!' it was me trying to tell the People, they wouldn't listen they behaved like they were already zombies. They reached down and grabbed something it looked alive they ate… then there eyes glazed and they were gone. Don't do it! Don't I can't remember as the dream's images begin to evaporate. My fellow worker Eli --- I can depend on Eli.. reached for a bigger fish he grasped it in two hands it was actually small. I couldn't stop him. I looked around. I couldn't stop anyone. I wanted to turn away maybe if I could shoot the food first and reveal the the alien green crud it it is actually made of.. people would stop… people might join me… they might save themselves, it was hopeless.. the only one left was going to be me.. what good is me alone. Life was coming to an end.

  I lay in bed. I breathed through the intensity of the Fear that had swept my emotions in dream state, now awake, sort of…. Clong!

  I turned on a light. I paused for a moment to look at the lid on the floor. Why did the lid fall? Why did my dream happen? … at so near the same time. What If I am the Zombie what if everyone else knows the truth and I have convinced myself of an alien plot to turn the people towards a slavery ...... , that just might be the construct of a Free Mind… with too much imagination.

  At my chaotic desk i turn on my old Mac Book that I bought last year again trying to maintain some connectivity to humankind.. at least what is called connectivity. (what is called humankind) I have no internet connection in my cabin.

  First I picked up my acoustic guitar, my beat up Spanish style made in Mexico guitar who once before had survived a frying pan lid falling on it in this same 11x7 cabin. My woodshed. My Cave in the hills. My Mexican Guitar … Find some thing to play.. make up a song of 'Resistance' I thought… The guitar was out of tune… my tuners battery was almost gone.. The strings tightened up but.. 'Use your ears you lazy musician' I said and gradually tuned it, got it -- struck three chords DGA …

  But I wanted to grasp that dream and the Clang before it faded away and so opened up the MacBook and started typing.

  Meanwhile right next to me on the desk is the issue of Nation magazine, front page story 'Zombie Ideology' It was given to me by my landlord, he made some comment as he handed me the magazine… he thought I might be interested in 'Zombie Ideology'  I think I have had the article by my bedside for almost a week. Why have I dragged my feet reading it. 'Zombie Ideology'

  The article begins like this… 'The Global tide of Populism, right and left is sweeping neoliberal ideology inexorably into it's grave, and none too soon. The neoliberal agenda pushes globalized markets, the entrepreneurial individual, and states that use technocratic means to pave the way for maximum market efficiency.'

   I wish it would sweep it away.

   Earlier today i leaned over the wall and listened to friends in a band called 'Koolerator' on the patio at Peri's Bar. On the way home… (My ears are weakened by bad listening habits and getting old… Can't stand in front of a band's Amplifiers like I used too .. though Darren's Sunday show at the Paper Mill had me for a good long set..) 'I hear you have been banned from Fairfax?' a friend asks me. Not true just being me… haven't been banned yet.

  Try harder Guy keep speaking your inner thoughts in your inner guide to Liberty and see who wants to ban you.

  In the meantime ..... I am a zombie again today. Consciousness is everything.
Inner thoughts what inner thoughts? Where is the rhythm and joy?